Saturday, August 27, 2016

Dear Women: How to Find a Man in 10 Days

The truth is, life isn't like the fairy tales we see on the silver screen. It's messier. And (to take a line from Jack Sparrow's book), the rules are more like guidelines in this dating game.

So, if there are no rules, no manual, and no boyfriends in sight, what's a girl to do?

But finding a boyfriend in ten days can be even easier than losing one. (And with these tips, you can even find one you'll actually want to hang on to).

Without further ado, here are ten things you can do to come closer each day to finding your next boyfriend.

Day One: Preparation
If you aren't prepared for a relationship, how can you expect to land a boyfriend when you do find him? Before you set off on a (literal) manhunt, work on yourself first.

Ask yourself:

  • Are you getting enough sleep?
  • Do you take time for personal hygiene and grooming before you head out the door?
  • Are you eating well and setting aside time to regenerate each day?
  • Do you spend time with friends and loved ones regularly?
  • Do you pursue your personal interests and goals?

These aren't revolutionary, but they are crucial to setting a foundation for a healthy relationship. Take care of yourself, and you will become happier, healthier, and more confident. Not only will you be ready for a boyfriend, but you'll also start attracting guys who appreciate your "got-it-togetherness."

Day Two: Treat Yo' Self
Once you've got your foundation, set aside a day just for you. Your future boyfriend can wait. Do something that makes you happy. Happiness is attractive, and the more content you are with you, the more magnetic your personality will become. (Besides, you want to look and feel your best for that boyfriend around the corner.)

Day Three: Find Your Confidence
Men love a woman who is comfortable with herself and owns who she is. You don't have to be an extrovert or the center of attention wherever you go. Quiet confidence is just as powerful.

How do you generate confidence? Here are a few tips:

Do power poses: Body language is one of the most important signals to others about your self-perception and level of interest in potential partners. Master power posing and watch the boyfriends come running.
Fake it to make it. You may not always feel confident, but if you act confident, others won't be able to tell the difference-and eventually, neither will you.
Smile. Like power poses, smiling has significant psychological impact on our self-perception. Smiling-even when you're sad-tells your brain that you're happy and confident. Plus, it makes you look friendly to eligible boyfriends-win-win!

Day Four: Get Up and Get Out
Unless you have a reservoir of boyfriends in your basement (in which case, you probably don't need to read this-and also, do we need to call the cops?), you'll have to leave your house to find a boyfriend. Luckily, you're armed with a balanced life and renewed self-confidence, so you're ready.

Plan a night out with some friends, head to the gym, or just run some errands. Whatever you decide to do, put yourself in situations where you can meet other people. You're not going to get anywhere (literally or figuratively) if you're always glued to the couch.

Day Five: Be Friendly
Finding a boyfriend is a lot easier if you're friendly. For the introverts out there, this doesn't mean you have to start conversations with a bunch of strangers, but don't linger in the shadows. Smile and engage in conversation. Show genuine interest in what others are saying-whether you want to date them or not.

Courtesy and kindness stand out. Curate good karma by spreading positivity and being generous with your time and interest. It won't be long before those positive vibes are reciprocated by a would-be boyfriend.

Day Six: Try New Things
Humans are creatures of habit. But don't let your routines turn into ruts. If you haven't found a boyfriend in your usual circles, you probably won't have luck waiting around for that to change.

Try a new restaurant, or attend an event you've never been to before. Consider striking out on your own. Even though going solo can be intimidating, it will force you to interact with others. You'll meet and connect with new people. And who knows? One of them might just be your next boyfriend.

Day Seven: Relax
Everyone needs a day off now and then. Sometimes the best way to find a boyfriend is to stop trying so hard. Take a day to relax and unwind. Let love have a day to come find you for a change.

Day Eight: Stay Open-minded
The people who are best suited for us are not always who we expect. As you put yourself out there and make friends, keep an open mind. Sometimes love is less about fireworks and more about a slow burn. Before you write a guy off as "non-boyfriend material," be open to taking the relationship to a romantic level.

Day Nine: Take Initiative
It's Day Nine and no boyfriend. Don't fret just yet! While everyone loves to be pursued now and then, there's nothing wrong with taking matters into your own hands. Most men love a woman who knows what she wants and goes after it. If you have your eye on a guy, harness your inner confidence (don't forget to power pose!) and ask him out.

You're a strong, independent woman! You can do this.

Day Ten: Commit
You made it to the finish line! Congratulations. By now you should have at least one guy on your radar who's interested. All you have to do is commit. Now, I know what you're thinking: "It's only been a few days. How can I just commit to a boyfriend so quickly?" Breathe. We're not asking you to put a ring on it or walk down the aisle (yet). Remember, the goal here was just to get a boyfriend­­­. But he's not your boyfriend until there is some level of mutual commitment. So woman up and make it happen, girl! Tell him how you feel. You won't know if he's The One until you give it a shot. So pick your guy, grab a love fern, and ride off into the sunset.

Finding a boyfriend isn't always easy. But if you are striving every day to improve and be the best version of yourself you can be, good things (including boyfriends) will surely come your way.

So sit back, finish your ice cream, and then go out and get one of your own!

(Credit: Familyshare)

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